


Unpredictable

by AshsHorrorShow



Category: Durarara!!
Genre: Angst, Established Relationship, Fear, Fluff, Implied Sexual Content, Insecurity, Introspection, M/M, Self-Esteem Issues, Trust Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-29
Updated: 2018-09-29
Packaged: 2019-07-20 10:10:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 941
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16135085
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AshsHorrorShow/pseuds/AshsHorrorShow
Summary: Izaya Orihara was unpredictable.On one hand, this excited Shizuo.On the other, it absolutely terrified him.





	Unpredictable

Izaya Orihara was unpredictable. Shizuo had learned to accept this as a fact of life. No matter how hard he tried, Shizuo probably would never come close to ever figuring the flea out completely. And the flea had really been showing this fact off as of late. The fact he and Izaya had been doing this ‘relationship’ thing for nearly a month now was something completely unexpected. He remember being completely shocked the first time Izaya had let him fuck him, so many years ago. After all, supposed sworn enemies such as themselves didn’t do stuff like that. But it happened and it continued to happen, until eventually those fucks evolved into more than just that. They evolved into dates and overnights at one another’s apartments. They turned it to something more. This fact was still surreal to Shizuo. He never would’ve thought of himself ever doing something like this with the flea… but he especially never would’ve expected Izaya to do it with him. But Izaya loved to defy expectations.

On one hand, the fact that Izaya was such a wild card _thrilled_ Shizuo.

On the other hand, it also _terrified_ him. 

These last few months had the two of them revealing things to one another that he was sure past versions of themselves would’ve _never_ told the other in a million years. But they also learned from experience too. 

For example, Shizuo had learned that Izaya’s skin was silky soft and felt great beneath his fingers. He learned that while Izaya was still his usual snarky and mean self, he also had a softer, nicer, more teasing side as well. He knew also knew that Izaya paid attention to him. He meant this in a conversational sense, like when Izaya would listen to him complain about his day at work, all while Izaya’s talented fingers massaged the kinks out of his muscles and left pleasant trails of comfort behind them However, he also knew that Izaya paid attention in other ways, like for example, Izaya’s fridge being stocked with stuff that he noticed Shizuo seemed to like. 

And such nice moments were beginning to add up. Shizuo was becoming addicted to the flea in a way.

Going to Izaya’s apartment started to become a thing he actually looked forward to at work. Whether they planned to fool around that night or to just hang out or do something completely different from both of those, it didn’t really seem to matter. He just found the prospect of doing anything (at least, if the flea was in a particularly foul mood that day) to be something exciting. Somehow, some way, the shitty flea had found a way to slowly inch his way into Shizuo’s heart.

But this scared him too. Izaya was not a person one should trust their heart over to that easily. 

And maybe it was leftover mistrust from the years, but Shizuo couldn’t help but wonder some days if this was all some one, long, cruel joke that Izaya was playing on him. That Izaya was just hanging around because Shizuo was proving himself useful or entertaining, but the second he grew even the slightest bit bored, he would be willing to throw Shizuo away as if he were nothing more than last week’s garbage.

It certainly seemed in-character for Izaya.

But then other times, the thought branched away from that into something that Shizuo almost found scarier in a way. That maybe, Izaya, like him, was genuinely wanting this to work and was enjoying himself… but as time went on, the spark they had eventually died within Izaya and he would grow bored and leave anyway with someone new who managed to energize that spark within him, again. 

The prospect of Izaya finding someone more interesting than him was always a very real fear in Shizuo’s mind. He may have his super-strength to differentiate him from the Average Joe on the street, but personality-wise, he was nothing too enigmatic. Ikebukuro and Shinjuku were probably chock full of characters who were more colorful and unique then him, people who Izaya could probably feel intellectually stimulated by. Couple that with the fact that Izaya was pretty damn attractive and could probably have anyone he wanted, so long as he kept his personality in check every now and again, and Shizuo couldn’t help but feel a little nervous at times, when he saw Izaya seemingly getting friendly with some random stranger.

Of course, nothing ever happened in those interactions, but Shizuo still found himself nervous every time. If Shizuo ever expressed this, Izaya would chide him and say Shizuo was the only person he was fascinated at this level with… but Shizuo couldn’t take much solace in this fact.

Izaya could be fickle. Shizuo had seen him get interested in subjects, investing hours of his time into said thing, only to forget about it or regard it with boredom and indifference a week later, once he seemingly milked every enjoyable aspect out of it. And who was to say, he wouldn’t do this with Shizuo? 

That he wouldn’t wake up one day and just decide he didn’t want to do this anymore?

But then again, Izaya may not do any of the stuff he mentioned there. He might just decide to stay with Shizuo forever. 

Shizuo didn’t know. He could never know… 

But sometimes, when these fears begin to plague at the back of his mind, he would wrap Izaya in his arms, trying to enjoy the feeling, the warmth all he could. Cause just one decision from Izaya and all of these good feelings could disappear.

Just like that.

**Author's Note:**

> Eh, just something random I whipped up. Not the best, but hopefully y'all enjoyed! <3
> 
> As always, critique is wanted, and if you see a mistake, feel free to point it out and I will fix immediately.
> 
> Hope you have a great day! <3


End file.
